An Invincible Summer - A Woman's Journey

My youngest is a teeny little 21-year-old. She could easily be mistaken for about 14. She took a job the other day helping out a woman she knew that was throwing a Halloween party. She and a friend of hers we're going to bartend. Apparently it wasn't terribly complicated since not too many 21-year-olds would know their way around a real bar. Some whiskey, some shots, some rum and Coke,  etc. etc.  When the guests started arriving she was pleased to realize that she knew a number of them.... parents of friends of hers. In addition, our former neighbors Annie and Darryl were there. These are people that are not necessarily close friends but ones that I know well. I served on the PTA with them,  our kids went to the same elementary, middle and high schools, I'm friends with tons of people at their church. The three of them, my daughter, Annie and Darrly, spent some time catching up as the party began. Quickly my daughter notice that this former neighbor was staring at h...

We do not say: Iran - formerly known as Persia Thailand - formerly known as Siam Bangladesh - formerly known as East Pakistan Why do we continue to say: Myanmar - formerly known as Burma Give that country a name and stick to it.

As I left the house this morning at 5:45am I was greeted by what must have been an 80° wind.  What would have at one time brought a smile to my face now just concerns me. Our firefighters and those of our neighboring states are exhausted and overburdened. Fires up north have been the deadliest in California history.  The wind needs to go somewhere else. The temps need to drop.  Keep cool my friends and stay safe.

I have worked painstakingly over the last three years tried to change my default thought process from negative to positive, from discontented to peaceful, from worry to grateful. I have made vast strides with frequent dips back the other direction but I am pretty pleased. How many people can say that they have even made a dent in changing their base personality? Failing often but overall  doing better and better. One of the things I do that has helped me is to try to start my day off right.  I attempt to wake with the thoughts of what I am grateful for today and I check in first thing with a daily Word For The Day email that reminds me there is more than one way to look at things.  Catastrophizing is something I am very good at. These days I may share concerns and I may have a knot in my stomach but I also know that most things seem to work out OK and it is a waste of my precious hours on this planet thinking about the worst that can happen rather than the possibilit...

This is a re-blog from three years ago. It warms my heart and brings a smile to my face. So much has changed since the day I posted this. The kids are all good and lovely and I am so proud of each of them. As humans, they are pretty special. I miss the daily interaction but know that they are all where they are suppose to be and I remain here, growing, learning, breathing and, mostly, loving them with all my heart. Just Being Grateful Today, I am grateful for so many things that I could go on for way too long. I will pick a few of the tops.  My oldest, who works so hard at connecting, purposefully touching on subjects that she knows are or thinks may be important. This doesn't come naturally, so I applaud her continual effort to reach out on a deeper level. I also love her acceptance that self care is so necessary. My second, whose intellect astounds me, but whose view on life confuses me. I love the way he has stepped up and showed a surprising maturity. Additionally, ...

The Secret Keeper, who is apparently in a more stable phase of bi-polar 1 disorder, texted me to ask if he could wash the windows at our house. He seems to be trying to start a business and he wondered if he could get some experience by doing mine. He mentioned that he would give me a 50% discount. I know I should be glad that he is trying to keep busy and support himself in any way possible. I'm not feeling that. There is a twisting in my stomach, a lump in my throat and spinning thoughts. Is that how guilt presents itself in physical form? I want this broken man to do well...for my children, for himself.....and, maybe, for me, so that I don't feel so bad. How selfish of me!!! God, I am a selfish person. We had a life together. We had 4 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats, a big beautiful home, 5 freakin cars, a silhouette of quail that returned yearly, two above average income jobs, a church and anything else you can think of that constitutes the strappings of a high-middle income fa...

I have decided that following the news in any substantial way is no longer good for me.  It had never occurred to me until my 1st born discussed the concept in a thread with her siblings. It seems that at least three of them have learned to be careful about how they allow news in their lives.  Makes perfect sense. Why would I knowingly add more stress to my life when it does not accomplish ANYTHING? So, have decided NONE before bed at all! I have committed to take in some slightly left leaning and slightly right leaning so that I get a full picture instead of only what backs up my core beliefs (which have been known to lead me astray). And finally, I commit to balancing any news out with some positive reading. Not just fiction but stuff that fills the soul.  Melody Beattie, Brene Brown, Don Miguel Ruiz, Michael Singer and John O'Donahue have been great. Cannot wait to see what else is out there. Do you have something that you turn to regularly or that has touched ...