An Invincible Summer - A Woman's Journey

WORD FOR THE DAY Fear is the cheapest room in the house. I would like to see you living in better conditions. HAFIZ This was our first time travelling together and it was not without some pretty good sized bumps. At times, Boy Scout was being a bit of an Asshole and we worked it out. Other times, fear became my best friend for a short period of time and things got ugly. Each time, with a lot of work, it deflated and became more manageable, less consuming and then I could breathe like a normal person.  Life is better when you have a room with a view.

Home now. Just getting a few memories written down.... After a long day of walking and touring, we enter Notre Dame Cathedral in order to enjoy a concert of Vivaldi that was advertised. Good music and a chair to sit in sounded fantastic. The Boy Scout with metal knees and a bad foot is tired and limping. I hurry in and quietly take a seat near the back.  He catches up and I say, “Would you like to get a little closer?”  He nods, grabs his bag and then proceeds to create a small slipstream behind him as he rushes forward. I’m surprised papers weren’t following the draft he made. I felt like a grandma trying to keep up with her 3 year old grandson.  He goes past the first and second sections. Breezes by a roped off area that has a sign that says “PRAYERFUL ONLY” and proceeds to sit his ass, front and center. A priestly mob of 5 come out and start prayers, and then a gal with a lovely voice sings in either French or Latin (not sure which). The peeps around us start r...

WORD FOR THE DAY People gain so much hope when they know they are not experiencing something alone. JOYCE RUPP The very reason I came to blogland in the first place. I have not been disappointed. You have made me laugh, cry, rejoice and feel heard.  For this, I thank you. 

Today we attended a church service at Saint Eustache in the 1st arrondissement of Paris.  The church has wonderful French gothic architecture and gorgeous windows. It’s current form was built between 1532 and 1632. The Inside artwork is stunning but darkened by years of being on a busy street as well as candle and incense burning.  Inside this massive church there are towering arches overhead with rays of sunlight coming from every direction. The choir is singing and though they are few considering the size of the church, their voices fill it well. The congregation, which is not over 150, are dwarfed by the sheer size of the place. I’m watching some parishioners on their knees on the solid, cold marble floor and wonder how hard it will be for some to rise. Interesting to watch an older women stand at an immense pillar with her forehead against it as if in penance.  Don’t know if that is a common occurrence or not.  As the priest spoke, in French of cour...

More and more, I find myself buying less. Not as many housewares, clothing, landscape items, etc. My needs are simplifying and I like it a lot. I do still eat out quite a bit but it is often a time of connection with friends and family. I like the idea of minimizing. I like the idea of a pretty basic wardrobe and not having to have it take a lot of my energy. Things have never once filled my emptiness for more than a few hours.  Additionally, I like the idea of spending less time on things and more time being present with people and being grateful for what is around me.  WORD FOR THE DAY To live content with small means; to seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion....In a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common. This is to be my symphony. WILLIAM HENRY CHANNING

Tonight was stunning.   Music has never been incredibly important to me, perhaps because of my hearing loss. I love certain songs and I love to dance but it has never been my passion. That being said, I am feeling an confluence of emotion because U2  is undeniably a passion. I sit here with the memories of a night well spent. Gone was my constraint and shyness, my poor sense of rhythm was brought richly into sync with the beat of the drums. I danced to poems of love, brotherhood, equality and justice set to music.  I felt pure happiness. And.....wait for it......tears.  Tears of love and connection, of memories so bittersweet ..... tears from this scarred woman who connects with this band so tightly.  Songs of my youth, of young motherhood and the here and now.  I thought of dancing with my kids and singing with them in the car until moms music became uncool and the stations got changed. I was reminded of love here and love gone.  I tho...

We leave for Paris tomorrow!! First real vacation since 2012. Keeping expectations low, anticipating good things and hoping to go with the flow. Praying that the dizziness sticks to a minimum. What more can I say except... À plus tard