Take A Good Look

Have you heard of mirror work?

Before I started writing this, I decided to Google “mirror work”. It did not produce what I thought it would. Quite the opposite. It gave me a bunch of stuff on exercise, getting in shape, looking your best.

The mirror work I am speaking of is purposefully taking time to look at oneself and offer the kind words and unconditional love that our inner being has always wanted or needed. I know, I know, it sounds hokey but it’s part of a multilayered plan to change the way one thinks and “talks” to oneself.

My inner critical voice has always been so loud. Picking, shaming, telling me how stupid I am. It had been with me so long I just took it as me, completely accepting it for truth. Whether that voice developed because that is what we heard in our family, or whether we developed it on our own because of things that may have happened in our families, it’s often there. I can trace mine way back to toddlerhood. It was already there in my earliest memory before the age of two. 

The practice is simple. Take a few minutes to get centered, look yourself in the eye, and simply say I love you. Make it a daily practice until it doesn’t feel laughable or ridiculous and then add on to that with other things you always wanted to hear like, for me, “You are smart” or “You are beautiful inside and out” or “You are worthy”. Louise Hay, with whom I am not a big fan, has a tiny little book that has weekly practices and journaling that goes with it, called Mirror Work, 21 Days to Heal Your Life. The 21 days part is bullshit but the exercises, along with other things, helped me change the way I speak to myself. 

The kinder inner voice in my head that allows me to try new things, stick myself out there with new people, encourages me when I fail, loves me more unconditionally. Isn’t that what we all want?

Is your inner voice kind?

Comments

  1. I've never heard this called "mirror work" before, but it's a good description! I think positive, personalized affirmations can be incredibly effective and healing, but they do take time to work. Sometimes a lot of time but persistence is the key! It's essentially re-education and that takes time.

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  2. My inner voice varies. I like it more sometimes than at other times.

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  3. I never thought about this before, My inner voice is not always kind. I like the practice you describe. I may have to try that.

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  4. My inner voice is an alarmist with a suicidal bent:)

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