Like A Dog With Two Tails

The Boy Scout has a generally happy disposition. His “happy quota” is pretty high. When he took a short term job washing dishes, he would come home and say, “I am blessed with work”. Things like “I love my job”, “We get to live here”, “I get to be with you”  and “My life is so good” come out of his mouth regularly.

There are studies that suggest that we are born with a baseline of happiness and that it remains, for most, about that level. Peaks and pits are circumstantial with the dial moving back to baseline when circumstances either level back out or become the new normal.

If the studies are correct, I would have considered my baseline well below average, generally looking for the next bad thing to happen. I wasn’t quite Eeyore but I sure as heck wasn’t Betty White.

When I read about the studies, I was disappointed, thinking that there was no real way to make it better. The small dark cloud would remain. 

This has not been the case for me. I’m still not Betty White but I am usually able to see the good. My default has shifted. My dial has risen a few degrees and it is noticeable in my relationships, my body and my inner monologue. Circumstances have remained the same but I’ve found my silver linings.

For today I am happier. Tomorrow will take care of itself. 


Comments

  1. Debra She Who SeeksJune 23, 2023 at 10:35 AM

    I saw a good quotation just this morning -- "Focus on the donut, not the hole" -- LOL! Not unduly dwelling on or obsessing about the negatives of life definitely pushes our happiness/contentment scale higher on the dial.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ColetteJune 23, 2023 at 2:25 PM

    I really love this post!

    ReplyDelete
  3. MargaretJune 23, 2023 at 3:48 PM

    Losing people I loved at a young age changed my perspective (default) entirely. I realized how quickly life can end and how much I needed to grab ahold and squeeze out the joy as much as possible. Like you I'm no Pollyanna but I am realistically optimistic.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Marie SmithJune 23, 2023 at 4:23 PM

    It must be a great thing to realize you’ve become a happier person! Another reason to be happy.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

What do you have to say about that?

Popular posts from this blog

Private Eye

Image
We pass by the house frequently since it sits on a busy thoroughfare. We know to look every time we pass and guess what will we see. Will it be the two Dalmatians, sitting on the couch that backs up to the giant panel window, waiting for their human to come home? Or will it be their human, sitting slightly to the right of middle (allowing for a better view of the giant mounted tv across the room) of the said couch. They are never there at the same time. It’s one or the other. One sleepless night, when my body was willing but my brain was not, I did a little sleuthing. It’s amazing what you can find out about a complete stranger.   His name is Gary and, from what I can tell, he’s never been married. He has worked his way up in a air duct company. He’s now the senior VP but it’s a small company and he still goes out on jobs, judging from  the reviews on Yelp. I know he has two siblings and that their father passed away in 2018. His memorial was held in a Buddhist temple and Gary sr. soun
Read more

Go!

Image
 Vai. E, se der medo, vai con medo mesmo. When one is raised in an angry family, it’s not enough to say I don’t want to be angry. You must learn how to do it differently. That’s no easy task. If judgment and self hatred became a way of life, a new way to live has to be taught. There are many ways to do it. Reading, writing, sharing, practicing all help the change. Counseling, psychoanalysis, religion, meditation, gratitude, have the ability to transform but I needed to see it in action, it needed to be more tangible, visual, accessible. I needed to understand the possibilities. There is a YouTube channel that I watch over and over again in order to absorb how to live more fully, more open and from the heart. One of the first episodes that I stumbled on is this…. The channel is Reflections of Life and through it we get to meet people who are doing life a little differently, often more soul based. People who are living life, healing wounds and finding what is truly important.  It can be
Read more

Things I Have Learned

 2 1/2 years have passed since I left everything I knew behind me.  Well, not everything. I brought along a Boy Scout, a Scruffy dog and the "stuff" that managed to be important enough to tow behind us.  This journey has been scary, challenging, wondrous, frustrating and, above all, life changing. Or should I say "Linda" changing. Ways I have changed: Fear is no longer the master of my life. It doesn't guide my choices, my relationships or anything else that it once lorded over. I learned for the very first time what unconditional love means. I have received it from a few people in my life but I did not know how to give it. Fear didn't allow it. Boy Scout has given it to me and, now, I am learning to return that gift. Loving him as he is. Joy entered. I look for it. Intentionally I seek it and find it regularly in little things. Even when life throws bumps, I eventually find my joy. Friendships. God how I had longed for friendships and how they eluded me. Th
Read more