Friends In High Places
I let you go as if you were not important. It is so unlike me especially since it is hardly the case. I love and admire you.
Why did I?
It is so complex. It’s taken me a long time to figure
it out.
You, truly one of the most resilient, exuberant and
grateful people I know, are a hard act to follow. As I left on this adventure, I felt fear, dread and resentment. It seeped into my life, gradually taking
up so much space in my heart.
I let other people go. That was easier, it was time.
But you……I just felt ashamed. How could I tell the friend who had been through so
much heartache and misfortune that I could not find my gratitude? How in the
world could I cry on the shoulder of the friend who trusts and makes the best
of each set back?
I couldn’t fake
it and I couldn’t muster anything that resembled good sense in my thoughts.
Through it all, you sent messages and phone calls and
unconditional love. You are amazing my friend. One of a kind. A bright star. Beautiful inside
and out.
I’m working it out. Heading in a good direction.
Just wanted you to know that I love you and hope you can forgive me.
If she's a true friend, she would have understood that you couldn't find your gratitude and wouldn't have judged you. She probably wonders what she did wrong.
ReplyDeleteI hope you reconnect and resume the friendship.
ReplyDeleteFriendships wax and wane; I've had that experience with several people. The pandemic has made it worse. I hope you can come to a resolution and find peace about the situation.
ReplyDeleteHope it works out!
ReplyDelete