For The Love Of Me

My kids and I have a place we can share the little things going on in our life’s. It’s an app called Discord. It can be hard to find time for a phone call that you know will take more than 1/2 hour but in Discord we share our hobbies, animals, hikes, passions, moves, jobs and boring life moments with the people that care the most.  I was sharing with them my feelings about job hunting for the first time in 39 years. 

In response, I got a lot of love!

The other day I was FaceTiming with my youngest. It’s lovely to be able to connect long distance. The interesting thing about FaceTime is that you see both the person you are talking to and yourself. It's so odd to see who you are (or appear to be) to them. When I am inside myself fully, which is very often with my kids, I feel like I am 30ish. But as I talked to her and saw myself too, I realized that what she sees is an older woman with a lot of wrinkles. Funny how my skins feels smooth on my body but is far from it on the outside.

That got me thinking about the coming job interview and realize that I don't look like the ideal candidate. This culture doesn't value older people in general but older women even more so. And then there is the hearing loss. With a deep sense of uneasiness, I consider how I will even bring that subject up.

I am working hard to love myself to the best of my ability in this unusual time and have the confidence that the right work will come up. It's an uphill battle.

Comments

  1. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)August 23, 2021 at 6:14 AM

    Mmmm....been here done that. I get it.
    But you are accomplished, skilled, great work ethic and would be an asset to any company.
    I hope you find your favorite job of all time out there. Just smile and be you - you're gorgeous!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ColetteAugust 23, 2021 at 7:39 AM

    Focus on your positive attributes in an interview. There is absolutely no need to mention the hearing loss unless it impacts on your ability to do the job. Moving and starting over is stressful at best, and is also a lot of hard, lonely work. Please consider finding a short term therapist to help you keep your confidence and energy level up. In time, this will all work out.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Marie SmithAugust 23, 2021 at 9:25 AM

    Self doubt has a tendency to creep in when we are in new situations. Go with your head held high and tell them who you are and what you’ve done and can do. You’ve got this, Linda.

    ReplyDelete
  4. SabineAugust 23, 2021 at 10:40 AM

    You know what to do, you wrote it all down here. It's hard to be proud of yourself, but you have reason enough for it.

    ReplyDelete
  5. JeanieAugust 24, 2021 at 1:26 PM

    I don't know what the job is, but don't set yourself up for defeat before you even go to the interview. You have experience. Judgment. Ability to synthesize data and understanding of people. You do NOT have to mention your hearing loss and with ADA they can't ask it. If it doesn't affect your ability to do the job, it's not your problem. If people don't like speaking up, that's THEIR issue. You can do this if you want it. Yes, you can!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

What do you have to say about that?

Popular posts from this blog

A Journey To Home

Image
My tender hearted girl decided she wanted to foster an old lady. Selkie is 14, is nearly deaf and nearly blind, has a hard time walking and uses her bark to get her needs met.  She got her home, took her for a bath and then basically loved this old girl for three weeks until the property manager decided that it wasn’t a good match (barking too much AND because she is a pit bull).  My girl knew it was probably temporary but she gave that dog a comfortable loving home, away from the chaos of the shelter, for a short time.  Ideally, she would have walked her home but that’s not how it worked this time.  Last night she stood and ugly cried on a strangers shoulder after giving her back.  I love that girl and her sweet heart.  I wish Selkie a new final home full of love. 
Read more

Private Eye

Image
We pass by the house frequently since it sits on a busy thoroughfare. We know to look every time we pass and guess what will we see. Will it be the two Dalmatians, sitting on the couch that backs up to the giant panel window, waiting for their human to come home? Or will it be their human, sitting slightly to the right of middle (allowing for a better view of the giant mounted tv across the room) of the said couch. They are never there at the same time. It’s one or the other. One sleepless night, when my body was willing but my brain was not, I did a little sleuthing. It’s amazing what you can find out about a complete stranger.   His name is Gary and, from what I can tell, he’s never been married. He has worked his way up in a air duct company. He’s now the senior VP but it’s a small company and he still goes out on jobs, judging from  the reviews on Yelp. I know he has two siblings and that their father passed away in 2018. His memorial was held in a Buddhist temple and Gary...
Read more

Go!

Image
 Vai. E, se der medo, vai con medo mesmo. When one is raised in an angry family, it’s not enough to say I don’t want to be angry. You must learn how to do it differently. That’s no easy task. If judgment and self hatred became a way of life, a new way to live has to be taught. There are many ways to do it. Reading, writing, sharing, practicing all help the change. Counseling, psychoanalysis, religion, meditation, gratitude, have the ability to transform but I needed to see it in action, it needed to be more tangible, visual, accessible. I needed to understand the possibilities. There is a YouTube channel that I watch over and over again in order to absorb how to live more fully, more open and from the heart. One of the first episodes that I stumbled on is this…. The channel is Reflections of Life and through it we get to meet people who are doing life a little differently, often more soul based. People who are living life, healing wounds and finding what is truly important.  I...
Read more