Money Isn't Everything

Housewarming get together.....done. Bathing Suit.........worn but not utilized.

I've known this for a long time but just to reiterate, money does not buy happiness. My #2 son, whose degrees are in math/economics, states that statistics show bliss maxes out somewhere around $90K a year and additional money after that does not increase contentment. 

Our friend's new home is STUNNING. French country, maybe 5 or 6 thousand sq ft, gorgeous stone everywhere, guest house with kitchen, closets the size of bedrooms, massive lot, lovely pool/hot tub, amazing landscaping, outdoor kitchen, gated community, etc. 

They have it all. Or do they?

They bickered, sniped and commented the whole evening. A couple of times it got uncomfortable when too much was disclosed and the other was angry or hurt. Too much drinking by him made her uptight, more comments made. They are bright, both being quite successful in their former careers, well traveled and adventurous, they have great stories and even more plans BUT they don't seem to like each other overly much.

I felt a little sad when we finally left, certainly not uplifted by experience. Before my marriage broke up, we had an above average income, not wealthy but more than comfortable. I loved my home (more than I should have), reliable cars, extra for vacations, savings and retirement but I had never been so unhappy and lonely in my entire life. 

There has been a flip. Income way down but happiness quotient going up all the time. 

At 56, I don't mind being more particular about how I spend my time. As much as I like them individually, together our friend's have an energy that saps my own. That's just how it is.

Comments

  1. Debra She Who SeeksAugust 22, 2020 at 8:03 AM

    Very, very true.

    ReplyDelete
  2. JenniferAugust 22, 2020 at 9:08 AM

    I'd rather sit in my tiny modest house, with a husband I adore and enjoy spending time with, than have any of those material things your friends have.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Marie SmithAugust 22, 2020 at 9:25 AM

    I know someone who walked away from money and a miserable life. She would have preferred at tent in a ditch to a mansion and misery. It took courage to walk away but she’s so much happier and doing well. Sometimes you have put yourself first and take the chance.

    ReplyDelete
  4. anne marie in phillyAugust 22, 2020 at 9:55 AM

    ew, that didn't sound like a fun outing. hopefully you all wore masks.

    I have a 1450 sq ft house, enough $$ to pay the bills and live comfortably. I am non-materialistic. I have a running car and a job. and many many internet friends. don't need nothing else.

    ReplyDelete
  5. BillAugust 22, 2020 at 12:23 PM

    That does not seem like a very happy couple. I would feel very uncomfortable living in a house that size. We live small but big in the happiness department and have enough money to get by and that's good enough for us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda devAugust 22, 2020 at 3:17 PM

      Totally agree. That’s the perfect balance.

      Delete
  6. MarthaAugust 22, 2020 at 3:45 PM

    I wouldn't have a clue what to do with a home that size. Very sad for your friends but it does often seem to work like that when people have way more than they need. I think those are friends I wouldn't spend time with when they are together anymore. Have a great evening!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaAugust 23, 2020 at 6:40 AM

      Me either. I'll take my 900 sq ft (but would love an actual closet).

      Delete
  7. JeanieAugust 22, 2020 at 6:23 PM

    Oh, boy. You nailed it. We've all known couples like that -- who almost make us uncomfortable to be around, even if individually they are grand. You're right about money and happiness. I remember the Diana days. But so many famous people. But you don't have to be famous to have that happen. I love this post, Linda. It's rather perfect.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaAugust 23, 2020 at 6:41 AM

      Very sad....you have everything and still not very happy.

      Delete
  8. Elle ClancyAugust 23, 2020 at 9:03 AM

    So true. I filed for divorce after 30 years of marriage; scariest thing I ever did but also the best thing (after my kids!) that I ever did. Being 57 and self-employed is pretty tough, especially now, but I do my best. It is definitely a better life!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda devAugust 23, 2020 at 12:18 PM

      Me too. 30 years, 57 and self employed. It can be hard but I’m am truly happy.

      Delete
  9. SabineAugust 23, 2020 at 11:27 AM

    Oh heck. What an experience and well, you had your learning curve and know how to read the signs.

    I remember reading about a research years ago where people of all income groups were asked how much money would make them happy and all answered that if they could have twice as much as they had now, they would surely be happy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda devAugust 23, 2020 at 12:20 PM

      I don’t need double. I don’t need more. I want to be content. That’s an inside job.

      Delete
  10. ColetteAugust 23, 2020 at 12:11 PM

    Good observations.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)August 23, 2020 at 6:00 PM

    We stopped seeing a couple because it became so uncomfortable to listen to them. So I understand the toxicity of it and how it zaps your energy.
    One brunch at our home when she called him a pussy and told him she wanted to punch his face, he just sat there and took it. It was so uncomfortable. It was awful.it was our home and yet rick and I got up and left and went outside.

    ReplyDelete

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