I Had It Wrong

To my girl:

I am sorry. 

I am sorry that I didn't know how much anger and pain I carried. That my pain showed itself in rage, which must have been so scary. That you walked on eggshells. That I didn't recognize your anxiety and depression for what it was. That my feelings of discomfort and anxiety were heaped on your shoulders. That you couldn't tell me who you were. That your body image was damaged by me. That, in my discomfort of not being enough, I forced you to behave in a way that was not you. 

In trying to do my "best", I did harm.

You are beautiful inside and out. You are perfect, whomever you love. You are not responsible for how anyone feels at any time, ever. You will always be my girl but I still have a lot of growing to do. I will keep trying to improve my "best".


Comments

  1. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)August 11, 2020 at 9:48 AM

    ❤❤❤❤❤

    ReplyDelete
  2. ToniAugust 11, 2020 at 11:35 AM

    Courageous post!

    ReplyDelete
  3. SabineAugust 11, 2020 at 12:15 PM

    So sad to read but thank you, courage in honesty.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Peter ClothierAugust 11, 2020 at 12:44 PM

    This is the first time I have seen your blog. It won't be the last. I can only guess at the "story" behind this entry, but that does not prevent me from admiring the way you so frankly own your feelings. Wishing you welll

    ReplyDelete
  5. Marie SmithAugust 11, 2020 at 1:17 PM

    Sending a hug across the continent, Linda.

    ReplyDelete
  6. anne marie in phillyAugust 12, 2020 at 4:36 AM

    look at how you have grown! I hope you and your daughter can come to an understanding. {{{{{hugs}}}}}

    ReplyDelete
  7. JeanieAugust 12, 2020 at 2:05 PM

    You are so brave. I hope your daughter realizes this.

    ReplyDelete

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