To Thine Own Self Be True

When I was 12, our family got a great gift of happiness. One of my sisters gave birth to my first of many nephews. That baby brought with him a lot of joy and hope that had been missing for awhile. To this day, I love that man to bits.

I was texting him this morning when he announced that he was only living to 48. Had he mentioned it to me? He must have.  NO darling, you haven't mentioned that little tidbit....do explain to my why you have only 4 years left on the planet. He proceeds to tell me that while using acid at 24, he was told that he was half way done.

Of course, makes perfect sense right? I mean, while you see things as they are NOT, and while trees are breathing, and walls melting, perhaps the sky falling in on you and.....once you're done, you realize the sky is not falling, walls melting or trees breathing but yeah....you're still half way done.

What the bloody hell?

This little goody two shoes would have stood in judgement at the reckless behavior and stupidity in the logic at one point......wait....I guess I still am. Ah well, I've still got a lot to learn about acceptance and letting everyone have their own truth. 

Live and let live.

Comments

  1. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)April 17, 2020 at 9:19 AM

    I have never done those types of mind altering drugs but I still would feel the same as he does. I get it. So until his 49th birthday he will always think about this. Poor kid.
    My mom died at 43. I always thought I would too. I didn't. It wasn't rational. I knew that but it didn't stop my mind from going there. I breathed a big sigh on my 44th birthday!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda devApril 17, 2020 at 9:43 AM

      In don’t pretend to understand. It scares me and I have to take a step away and just love him.

      Delete
  2. anne marie in phillyApril 17, 2020 at 9:29 AM

    VERY unhealthy attitude there. can you alert other family members/medical professionals as to what's happening?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda devApril 17, 2020 at 9:42 AM

      I wish. He is a rock unto himself. He learned it at his fathers knee. That man thought he had it all worked out, too closed off to ever question is own thoughts. It sever him poorly until he died alone

      Delete
  3. Debra She Who SeeksApril 17, 2020 at 9:50 AM

    Let's hope it's not a self-fulfilling prophecy -- power of suggestion and all that.

    ReplyDelete
  4. ColetteApril 17, 2020 at 12:11 PM

    Sigh. I hope at some point he lets go of this. I was doing acid as a young woman and ate a bowl of Campbell's bean with bacon soup. I swear the beans cried out in pain as I chewed them up. At first I thought I must stop eating anything that was once alive. Then I realized there would be nothing to eat. If LSD does anything, it reaches into your unconscious mind and yanks its chain. Very often it (the UC) doesn't welcome the intrusion and reacts badly. It is, after all, still just you. This is the stuff of "bad trips." That doesn't make them true. However, I know - he will believe what he wants to believe. I am sad for him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaApril 17, 2020 at 1:09 PM

      Oh my, Colette. Being who I am, what you say freaks me out a bit. At the same time, I’m terribly curious too. Have you ever written about it?

      Delete
  5. JeanieApril 17, 2020 at 12:50 PM

    I was just so relieved I lived to be older than my mom. I was sure I'd be on the early end. And maybe I will be in the grand continuum of things. But I'm not ready yet. I hope he isn't either. (I hope he was joking...)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaApril 18, 2020 at 6:28 AM

      He wasn't but I expect he will be surprised just like so many of us when the date comes and goes.

      Delete
  6. Marie SmithApril 17, 2020 at 1:39 PM

    My father died at 60 and I wondered if I would. It was an unexpected relief.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaApril 18, 2020 at 6:27 AM

      I can imagine it was. Funny how so many people do that.

      Delete
  7. AnonymousApril 17, 2020 at 3:23 PM

    Maybe "halfway done" meant enlightenment, and that when he gets to be 48, he'll know what it all means. Not death but a complete understanding of it all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaApril 18, 2020 at 6:28 AM

      Perhaps, even on acid, it's how we look at the world. Positive or negative....we get to choose.

      Delete
  8. SabineApril 18, 2020 at 3:37 AM

    Ah but "halfway" while on acid could mean anything. Time expanding and stuff, no?
    At least he had a most memorable experience.

    ReplyDelete
  9. BillApril 19, 2020 at 11:45 AM

    My dad died when he was 67 and I always wondered if I would live that long. I was 21 at the time and his age seemed like it would take forever to reach and really I didn't think I would. I worked out the exact date when I would be older than him and I just passed it last month. I find it incredible to still be alive at this age. I take it as a gift.

    ReplyDelete

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