Here's Looking At You, Kid.....

WORD FOR THE DAY

Imperfection and perfection go so hand in hand, and our dark and our light are so intertwined, that by trying to push the darkness or negative aspects of our life to the side...we are preventing ourselves from the fullness of life.
JEFF BRIDGES
The twisted idea of perfectionism has a been around for quite awhile. I'm no expert but I think the women's movement of the 70's had a little hand in that destructive practice by implying we could have it all. I was one of those who tried to have a satisfying career, a perfect house, well adapted children doing fantastic in school, a good marriage, being connected in my church, etc. It's a path of self delusion and disappointment.

The new perfectionism is far more heinous and ugly. I see it in women of all ages but it especially afflicts the young. The creation of perfection on social media and the way the young chase it down through lifestyle and body alterations and then doing the exact same thing themselves by presenting selfies of their bodies from the perfect angle or have a blast with friends. A vicious cycle of fiction and fantasy.

One of the saddest results of this perfectionism is this thing people (mostly women) are doing to their faces. Especially in more affluent areas, you will find women who look sickenly like marionette puppets. They cut into, poke and prod so much stuff in their face they become an oddity that makes an observer need to kind of stare and wonder, "What are you thinking?".

I could name 7 or 8 actors or singers, right off the bat, that have done it. Not just a little facelift or botox but the whole nine yards of not quite looking human. I am saddened by it.

Shame we women can't have a REAL women's movement that allows us to be flawed, human, age and still love ourselves and each other. I hate the words, "Wow, she hasn't aged well".

I love the above quote and the idea of embracing ourselves completely. The good and the bad, the dark and the light......the smooth and the wrinkled.

Have a fantastic Tuesday.

Comments

  1. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)October 1, 2019 at 7:56 AM

    I saw Maria Shriver on TV and she has had a lot of work and injections and it is hard to hear her, I just stare at her face. It is sad that we feel we need to do this. I understand it. I think I'd do somethings if I could afford to. But I can't. So I look at my face daily and can't believe what I see. Thankfully my husbands eyesight isn't what it used to be as well so he still thinks I am cute, poor guy. Cute is long gone and in my rear view mirror. But otherwise I'm still have a fire behind these eyes and I'm a damn great catch, friend, sister and daughter. If you can see past the older face and body then you'll be my friend. Besides standing with me will be fun and we'll laugh a lot and look younger from that alone! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaOctober 1, 2019 at 9:08 AM

      I understand it too.

      It's so funny that you say that about "cute". I am so far from cute and yet Boy Scout will say that and I just laugh at him. And I agree.....You are a great catch.

      Delete
  2. Marie SmithOctober 1, 2019 at 8:40 AM

    I hear you, sister. Couldn’t agree more. Wrinkles are well earned. I am proud of mine.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaOctober 1, 2019 at 9:08 AM

      I am learning to love them. I am glad I have some coattails to ride on.

      Delete
  3. BillOctober 1, 2019 at 12:34 PM

    It's sad that some people still want to look young and would pay to have their faces or whatever altered to look younger. Think about all the people that didn't have the opportunity to live as long as we have. Some of the photos I see of people who had facelifts look absolutely nightmarish. I'll just take what I got and be thankful I am still living and healthy. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. anne marie in phillyOctober 1, 2019 at 2:34 PM

    I am what I am. period.

    ReplyDelete
  5. JeanieOctober 1, 2019 at 8:39 PM

    We were watching something the other night -- can't remember what -- and Rick said, "What has she done with her face?" Whomever it was looked so tight, so pulled back. I'm sure it's an effort to look young but the effect was just the opposite. I'd rather not have multiple chins or the "eleven" wrinkles atop my nose but I worked hard for those wrinkles; I had a life for them; I earned them. (The chins are just negligence!) But they're my chins. And if they go away it's because I'll have to work really hard at it -- harder than I want to work! And I'm OK with them. My choice. Beautiful post and well stated.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

What do you have to say about that?

Popular posts from this blog

Private Eye

Image
We pass by the house frequently since it sits on a busy thoroughfare. We know to look every time we pass and guess what will we see. Will it be the two Dalmatians, sitting on the couch that backs up to the giant panel window, waiting for their human to come home? Or will it be their human, sitting slightly to the right of middle (allowing for a better view of the giant mounted tv across the room) of the said couch. They are never there at the same time. It’s one or the other. One sleepless night, when my body was willing but my brain was not, I did a little sleuthing. It’s amazing what you can find out about a complete stranger.   His name is Gary and, from what I can tell, he’s never been married. He has worked his way up in a air duct company. He’s now the senior VP but it’s a small company and he still goes out on jobs, judging from  the reviews on Yelp. I know he has two siblings and that their father passed away in 2018. His memorial was held in a Buddhist temple and Gary sr. soun
Read more

Go!

Image
 Vai. E, se der medo, vai con medo mesmo. When one is raised in an angry family, it’s not enough to say I don’t want to be angry. You must learn how to do it differently. That’s no easy task. If judgment and self hatred became a way of life, a new way to live has to be taught. There are many ways to do it. Reading, writing, sharing, practicing all help the change. Counseling, psychoanalysis, religion, meditation, gratitude, have the ability to transform but I needed to see it in action, it needed to be more tangible, visual, accessible. I needed to understand the possibilities. There is a YouTube channel that I watch over and over again in order to absorb how to live more fully, more open and from the heart. One of the first episodes that I stumbled on is this…. The channel is Reflections of Life and through it we get to meet people who are doing life a little differently, often more soul based. People who are living life, healing wounds and finding what is truly important.  It can be
Read more

Let's Be Perfectly Clear

I would like your input on this letter I am considering sending out. Darryl, I once considered you, if not a friend, a very friendly acquaintance. Our daughters are the same age. I am sure that your daughter is as special to you as mine is to me. McKenna is 21 years old and starting out her life with some tough situations. SHE IS NOT AN OBJECT. She is a person who has her ups and downs, her struggles and triumphs. She has, in the past year, completely alone, had to make scary medical decisions for her mentally ill, addicted father. She has had to watch as the man who was an amazing father slowly turn into a shell of a man who has little to give and much to take. Whether purposefully or accidentally, you have added to her already difficult year. I wonder…would you appreciate my ex-husband leering and making inappropriate comments to your daughter over the course of a long evening? Think about that for a moment!  What were you hoping to achieve with your behavior? Whether
Read more