That Smarts

Through the years our kids will sometimes cause us pain. Whether it is from harsh words, bad choices or lack of consideration, it can sting.

Now that mine are either adults or young adults those things happen hardly ever. Partially because we are not so tightly intertwined and, hopefully, because I have learned to let go and let live. But there are times, on occasion, when words are said or unsaid, when I feel diminished. It hurts. It’s almost as if I am not a person with feelings. I want to lash out but that would be my inner child who is entirely thinned skinned. I don’t and let it pass.

They are still young and have a lot to learn. I will take a tub and lick my wounds and keep my words to myself, and remember that I sometimes use words that feel weapons too. Next time I am engaging with someone, I  may be more careful.

Comments

  1. Marie SmithSeptember 1, 2019 at 3:35 AM

    The most cutting of instruments has a different metal!

    ReplyDelete
  2. My life so farSeptember 1, 2019 at 5:37 AM

    Families are damned complicated and so good at hurting each other. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  3. GraceSeptember 1, 2019 at 8:45 AM

    Because sarcasm is my first language, and because my family are masters of derogatory abusive language, I have learned to speak my initial reaction internally and voice only neutral reactions. It hasn't always been easy but it has brought more peace, to me, at any rate.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Debra She Who SeeksSeptember 1, 2019 at 9:01 AM

    I look back now at some of the unkind or unfair things I said to my Mom, and cringe. We all knew everything when we were young, didn't we?

    ReplyDelete
  5. JeanieSeptember 1, 2019 at 11:04 AM

    We've all had those moments -- and still do... it's the goes 'round, comes 'round, I suppose. You will all survive, I hope. Licking wounds is a good start.

    ReplyDelete
  6. BillSeptember 1, 2019 at 11:38 AM

    Sometimes my wife will give me a look when I speak words that have an edge to them or my tone is kind of nasty. Then I put that in my memory bank so I won't repeat it again.
    I love that quote, it says it all!

    ReplyDelete
  7. BohemianSeptember 4, 2019 at 5:31 PM

    Yes, Words unfiltered can leave so much damage in their wake. All of our Children and most of our Grandchildren are now Adults and my expectation is that they will still show respect to their Elders and yet also feel that I value their input as Grown Maturing/Matured Individuals too and will mutually respect them. The behavior of Adults making wrong choices has mostly been the bane of Parenting Adult Children and Adult Grandchildren... a huge part of you wants to spare them Life's harsh consequences for foolish actions and poor choices. Of coarse, leaving a line of communication open to where they know they can consult their Elders with solicited advice works wonders... I refuse to give unsolicited advice to any Grown person. I Hope the Hurt and Sting of whatever transpired can Heal quickly or be discussed later when Emotions aren't so Raw?

    ReplyDelete

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