I Am My One and Only

When we love ourselves it is so much easier to love others and that love for others becomes far richer, possibly with less conflict.

Giving myself a break for failing, coming up short or simply for being human frees me up from judging other so harshly. It's a hard thing to do and it does not happen magically. I've started in that direction by doing a number of things:

  • Regularly attend ACA meetings, rubbing elbows, expressing my feelings and, most importantly, listening to the people who are on a similar journey.
  • Reading material that helps me understand myself better, uncovering the scars to allow healing.
  • Putting reminders on my wall, in my podcasts, and fill my ebook library with affirmations.
  • Reevaluating the health of my relationships and why I hold on if they are not all that healthy.
  • Following bloggers that show a tremendous amount of self love.
  • Making apologies to myself when I fail.
  • Thinking before I speak.
  • Being present and enjoying the moment.
I'm doing pretty good and life keeps getting better and better.

I know we've talked about this before but I need all the help I can get. Do you love yourself? If you do, tell me how you got there. If you don't, are you trying?

Comments

  1. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)August 26, 2019 at 7:59 AM

    I do! I always have. I was born this way I think. I could write a book on this topic here. I won't do that to you. But someday I will share with you Rick's words to me on our first meeting. I did not take them well but because I had just met him I bit my tongue and asked him to explain. He did, it was better. I now know that after 32yr with his man he doesn't always articulate what he means in the best of ways. So my hurt that night is now met with laughter because what he said and meant were really a very nice compliment.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaAugust 27, 2019 at 6:15 AM

      I'm amazed at how much inner strength and sense of self you have.

      Delete
  2. anne marie in phillyAugust 26, 2019 at 11:05 AM

    I think I am FABULOUS!

    but it took 4 years of therapy to get there.

    and having a friend love me for who I AM instead of who he thought I SHOULD BE.

    that's why I have gay men as friends; they don't try to change me, they love me for who I am.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaAugust 27, 2019 at 6:14 AM

      I think your fabulous too! But luckily, when you love yourself you're not too concerned what others think.

      Delete
  3. Marie SmithAugust 26, 2019 at 11:38 AM

    Being present in the moments is a huge one for me. I came out of a really dark period by focusing on daily gratitudes. That led to being present in the moments. Life became enjoyable again.

    ReplyDelete
  4. JeanieAugust 26, 2019 at 12:23 PM

    Do I love myself? Yes. There are parts of me I don't particularly like (like my hips and weight, for example) but I also know those are the surface. The real me is the part that gives, loves, learns, cares, tries, laughs, finds joy in life. I don't know how I got there. Age, maybe? And just realizing that life doesn't have to be a competition. But it does need to be fulfilling and gratifying, even if it's challenging. I love my true friends and I think, "Would I want me as a friend?" and yes I would.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaAugust 27, 2019 at 6:13 AM

      One of the reasons I starting following your blog♥

      Delete
    2. JeanieAugust 28, 2019 at 12:31 PM

      What a wonderful and nice thing to say. Thank you!

      Delete
  5. Debra She Who SeeksAugust 26, 2019 at 1:07 PM

    I've been blessed with pretty good self-love and self-esteem right from day one, but I've had to defend it over the years from the corrosive, negative effects of society's misogyny and homophobia. Continual positive, corrective self-talk is what does the trick, in my experience. Also reading books, affirmations, all the things you mention. I struggled a lot with self-confidence when I was younger too, not being sure of myself. The solution for that is to do things and show yourself that you can do it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. BillAugust 26, 2019 at 1:59 PM

    Being married to an incredible woman who always looks at life with a positive attitude taught me a lot of things. She believed in me and eventually I did too. We have been very supportive of each other through the years and we are very fortunate to be a couple.

    ReplyDelete
  7. SabineAugust 27, 2019 at 3:34 AM

    I love this. My mother rarely had positive words about her two daughters and her criticism stung and stayed with me for a long time. I learned to love myself when I became a mother.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousAugust 28, 2019 at 7:05 AM

    I'm not sure I love myself, but I do accept myself for who I am. That includes all my many, many flaws. My only rule is to not hurt others in how I care and protect myself.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda dAugust 28, 2019 at 1:01 PM

      Ah there is the rub. I’ve not learned how to care for my inner child enough to prevent her from lashing out once in awhile.

      Delete

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