What Are You Looking For?

Aca (Adult Children of Alcoholics) talks a lot about recreating childhood chaos. I’ve always known that as the “at home feeling”. It says that many of us are ill-at-ease with the peace that might become a part of our lives and that we subconsciously will find ways to recreate our “at home feeling”.

I hate the idea, and yet, I’m pretty sure I do it on occasion. Life can be going fairly smoothly and my brain will tell me there’s something wrong and that it needs to be fixed. It’s a pretty nasty piece of work made worse by the fact that I am completely unaware that it’s happening.

Luckily, I have a program and support, some tools and my higher power to help me in the process of changing. I want peace to prevail even if my brain is still searching out the chaos of my parental home. 

Comments

  1. Debra She Who SeeksJuly 23, 2019 at 6:35 AM

    That's the value of ACA -- it shows us the patterns that otherwise would remain unconscious but oh so destructive.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)July 23, 2019 at 7:26 AM

    very insightful. Working on ourselves is an never ending process I think. Because if you aren't evolving what is the point of our lives?

    ReplyDelete
  3. SabineJuly 23, 2019 at 7:44 AM

    This is a hard thing to overcome. I have acted like my mother, all that passive-aggressive stuff (minus the drink and the drugs) so often, I should know.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Marie SmithJuly 23, 2019 at 9:23 AM

    It’s a work in progress like so many things in our lives, Linda. Everyone has something...me, I need to stop trying to fix things for people.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My life so farJuly 25, 2019 at 5:16 AM

    I'm like that sometimes too. My dad wasn't an alcoholic but he was an angry control freak, probably because of his mum's alcoholism. I find peaceful strange. I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

    ReplyDelete

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