Thursday, May 9, 2019

Mad About...,,

Today I’m angry.

I’m angry that life hasn’t turned out the way I had planned. I’m angry at that addict that turned everything upside down. I’m mad that all my kids have to leave this fucking town and I wonder why I have to stay. What is the point when you can’t have your family around?

It’s ok though

I know it’s not really anger but grief and I know that it’s normal and will dissipate over time but, for now, I will sit in it. Not wallowing but feeling and not telling myself it’s stupid to feel this way. Recognizing that its normal to feel the loss of a child leaving.

Tomorrow is another day. 

11 comments:

  1. Oh yes. I hear you.

    When my daughter decided to make the world her homeland I thought I just needed to wait this out and let her travel. But then she decided to make her home on the other side of the planet and to have a career and a family. It sounds awful, yes? But we are in contact daily, sometimes several times. We have long serious conversations and silly chats no matter what time of day or night. I honestly don't think we would share so much if she had settled in this country.
    Of course I still hope that one day we'll live closer together - that's the plan anyway.

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  2. I'm so sorry. When my daughter moved away (and took my then only grandchild with her) I thought I was going to die from the loss. It is very normal to feel this loss.

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  3. We miss our daughter who currently lives in Oregon. It was hard at first but she's doing great and has been over to visit last year. She seems happy so that makes us happy. It's hard but does get better.

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  4. Indeed, these feelings are perfectly normal. It will get easier in time, especially knowing that your kids and happy and thriving. Sending you lots of hugs xo

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  5. I remember feeling so angry when my ex and I sold our house. I was angry cleaning until I realized it was actually sad cleaning. It's hard. Sending hugs.

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  6. It IS grief. And it's not wrong to feel it. Or the anger and frustration that comes with grief. So many of us have felt those feelings. Truly. I'm so sorry that this time it's your turn.

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