Talk, Talk, Talk

We have a friend that we are very fond of. A chance meeting, when he completed our threesome on the golf course. You never know what your going to get when the course fills your empty spot on busy days, but Hank was a treat. He is a bad golfer and a very good sport.

 Just one thing....he has trouble talking about anything but himself. He was called on it once, "It's all about you Hank, isn't it?", at which point it admitted that was a problem for him but yet it continues. We sat with him for 3 hours last night and of that 3 hours I might have talked a total of 10 minutes, many of those minutes was me asking questions in regards to his discourse. He even manages to keep the Boy Scout's normal loquaciousness to a minimum.

 He did pointedly ask the appropriate questions, "How is your wrist?" "How is your work" and "How are the dogs?" and politely listened to the answers and then turned the conversation back to himself and, boy, this man can talk! It is frustrating and tiring.

 Do you have any people like that? And how do you handle them?

Comments

  1. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)February 28, 2019 at 9:42 AM

    I used to.
    I have left them behind.
    I did a nice thing to help her. I did more nice things to help her. Then she called me to help her. Then when I got my cancer diagnosis Rick was not around. I need to talk to someone, I called her. I said Hi, how are you? And ofr she went bitching, moaning, telling stories never coming up for air. Most often it was her typical negative crap and bitching. Then she said well I have to go. I called for support, a friend. It was all about her. I didn't feel right interrupting her to say Hey I need a friend, I'm scared.
    So I removed her from FB and that started the removal of her from my life. I know it sounds harsh but it hit me like a ton of bricks that day. I don't need friends like that, it is one sided you know? I need a two way relationship.
    BTW, good word, loquaciousness. :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaFebruary 28, 2019 at 11:01 AM

      If you ever got out here, or if we ever get out there...you will understand. Loquacious is a far better word than verbose with all its negative connotations. And a talker is nice to have around when my introvertedness tells me I just don't feel like engaging overly much. I get to listen and learn from the conversations and without the weighty responsibility of "holding my own".

      And that is NOT harsh. I have removed many a person for that reason. Too old to be bothered!!!

      Delete
  2. AnnsterwFebruary 28, 2019 at 10:34 AM

    I completely agree with Margaret!! I do not have time for people that take and take and never give! Takers will find people and suck them dry and then move on. I cannot be used like that anymore...better to move on without them and let them suck someone else dry! Fro real! Hugs Annster's Domain

    ReplyDelete
  3. JeanieFebruary 28, 2019 at 12:28 PM

    I do. And I try to arrange time with them only when I am mentally ready for it. OR, get together in a small group of three or four so the energy dynamic changes. But I know just what you mean.

    ReplyDelete
  4. MarthaFebruary 28, 2019 at 1:27 PM

    I know individuals like that but I spend little to no time with them :) It is exhausting, and honestly, it's just not worth it. There isn't a fair exchange in conversation and there is nothing to be gained by it. These individuals may as well just sit in front of a mirror! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  5. anne marie in phillyFebruary 28, 2019 at 2:15 PM

    I know a few of those. I do not associate with them. boring, obnoxious, selfish, self-centered idiots!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Debra She Who SeeksFebruary 28, 2019 at 2:49 PM

    Oh yes, I've met self-centred narcissists like this. I avoid them if I can because they are energy vampires.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Marie SmithFebruary 28, 2019 at 3:36 PM

    Avoidance works well I find.

    ReplyDelete
  8. JenniferFebruary 28, 2019 at 5:45 PM

    I've met plenty of those people, too. I try to avoid them as much as possible. Life's too short to entertain narcissists.

    ReplyDelete
  9. ColetteMarch 1, 2019 at 4:33 AM

    I used to work for someone like this. I felt trapped whenever he walked into my office because I knew he would be there way too long and talk the whole time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LindaMarch 1, 2019 at 5:14 AM

      I feel small with him sometimes. Like his world is so much bigger, making so much more money, meeting influential people of great affluence that my small world is not of much consequence.

      Delete
  10. BillMarch 1, 2019 at 11:58 AM

    We used to have a neighbor that talked a lot when we crossed paths. I found it easy just to say I'm on my way to wherever and usually that would work. The person could talk for hours, It's best if you can just avoid the person.

    ReplyDelete
  11. My life so farMarch 3, 2019 at 2:52 PM

    I have a sister like this. I've learned to just walk away.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

What do you have to say about that?

Popular posts from this blog

Private Eye

Image
We pass by the house frequently since it sits on a busy thoroughfare. We know to look every time we pass and guess what will we see. Will it be the two Dalmatians, sitting on the couch that backs up to the giant panel window, waiting for their human to come home? Or will it be their human, sitting slightly to the right of middle (allowing for a better view of the giant mounted tv across the room) of the said couch. They are never there at the same time. It’s one or the other. One sleepless night, when my body was willing but my brain was not, I did a little sleuthing. It’s amazing what you can find out about a complete stranger.   His name is Gary and, from what I can tell, he’s never been married. He has worked his way up in a air duct company. He’s now the senior VP but it’s a small company and he still goes out on jobs, judging from  the reviews on Yelp. I know he has two siblings and that their father passed away in 2018. His memorial was held in a Buddhist temple and Gary sr. soun
Read more

Go!

Image
 Vai. E, se der medo, vai con medo mesmo. When one is raised in an angry family, it’s not enough to say I don’t want to be angry. You must learn how to do it differently. That’s no easy task. If judgment and self hatred became a way of life, a new way to live has to be taught. There are many ways to do it. Reading, writing, sharing, practicing all help the change. Counseling, psychoanalysis, religion, meditation, gratitude, have the ability to transform but I needed to see it in action, it needed to be more tangible, visual, accessible. I needed to understand the possibilities. There is a YouTube channel that I watch over and over again in order to absorb how to live more fully, more open and from the heart. One of the first episodes that I stumbled on is this…. The channel is Reflections of Life and through it we get to meet people who are doing life a little differently, often more soul based. People who are living life, healing wounds and finding what is truly important.  It can be
Read more

Let's Be Perfectly Clear

I would like your input on this letter I am considering sending out. Darryl, I once considered you, if not a friend, a very friendly acquaintance. Our daughters are the same age. I am sure that your daughter is as special to you as mine is to me. McKenna is 21 years old and starting out her life with some tough situations. SHE IS NOT AN OBJECT. She is a person who has her ups and downs, her struggles and triumphs. She has, in the past year, completely alone, had to make scary medical decisions for her mentally ill, addicted father. She has had to watch as the man who was an amazing father slowly turn into a shell of a man who has little to give and much to take. Whether purposefully or accidentally, you have added to her already difficult year. I wonder…would you appreciate my ex-husband leering and making inappropriate comments to your daughter over the course of a long evening? Think about that for a moment!  What were you hoping to achieve with your behavior? Whether
Read more