Never Again?
WORD FOR THE DAY
By learning to accept and even embrace
the inevitable sorrows of life, we can experience a more enduring sense of happiness. |
SHARON SALZBERG
|
I know this is not referring to it specifically, but I am always surprised by people who lose a pet and decide they will never get another because it hurts too much. Pets enrich life so much, that to shutter the idea of ever getting another because of the pain of grief is so foreign to me. Living means grieving, it is inevitable. There are many studies the show that people who are accepting of all their feelings, whether society deems them good or bad, fare better, both emotionally and psychologically, than those who attempt to repress or avoid.
I do, however, understand the idea of the last dog. My sweet auntie and her husband have had dogs for the last 60 years. They had boxers and retrievers over and over and I can remember being particular friends with 2 of the many. Their last one, Gidget, passed and they decided she was their "last dog". It broke our hearts. My sisters and I told them that any of us would care for a dog if need be but they opted out. I get it.
I love my fur baby more than most can even understand. But I don't think I will get another dog when she leaves us. Not because I can't bear to go through the pain again. But because at my age it stops us from traveling as much as we'd like. I have her and I would not change a thing, she more important that going somewhere. But in 3 years or so when she goes to the rainbow bridge I think it will be my last.
ReplyDeleteThen again, I say that now. Rick and I love retrievers, golden and labrador, so we might just be fooling ourselves now. :-)
Now that I totally understand. A pet can sure tie one down.
DeleteI thought I was going to lose my mind when my Lucky passed away - she was my 19 year old cat that I purchased with my ex-husband. She was with me for my engagement, wedding, divorce, drinking, recovery, purchase of first house and so many other milestones!! She got me through my divorce and when I was drinking and wanted to die - having to take care of her is the reason I did not take my own life before I entered recovery!! When she reached the end of her life; I was so sad and soooo lost!!! But after a few weeks; I realized that she would not want me to be alone and sad! She woudl want me to share my love and my home with a needy pet that needed some love! So I rescued a sister and brother Kidrock and Angelica! I had them for the next 18 years and when they both passed I got two more cat rescues (two boys Nermie and Trouble) and a year later two rescue girl cats that were found in a barn. So, now I have four!!! Death is awful but I would not trade feeling that grief for not feeling the love of a pet for 20 years...but that's just me...
ReplyDeleteRight!! I get it. My Sophie helped me through similar life experiences. So much love! Everyone is different and I get that but to forgo the joy is beyond me.
DeleteWhen my last dog died, I said never again. But that feeling only lasted a week. And here I am with TWO dogs now!
ReplyDeleteTwo gorgeous dogs, I might add
DeleteI hear what you say, and I miss having animals (my last one died two years ago); however, I'm in my late 60's now and I don't want to worry about who would take my cat or dog if I died. Silly, I know.
ReplyDeleteNot at all. I could think of a number of reasons, like....will they love them like I do, or I don’t wont to i,pose such a big responsibility. I would probably have a hard time with that.
DeleteI get it. Completely. I sometimes wonder if Lizzie is my last cat. I hope not. But assuming she lives a long life she might have only another seven to ten years left. And who knows where I might be physically at that time. (Hopefully, mentally, all there!). And is that fair to her -- or to someone who would be responsible in the end? I just don't know. So, I savor every day and decide we'll figure that out when the time comes.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, you started a post that never appeared about blog building. If you want to discuss on or off blog, email me.
I get it too. There will be a time...
ReplyDeleteI still miss my dogs and cats. I haven't any pets here but we are thinking about rescuing an older dog. Pets, your heart breaks when they leave but I wouldn't never say no to another animal. They are the best friends ever.
ReplyDeleteLast January we had to put down our sweet cat at the age of 8! She was way too young to leave us and we were devastated. We took a little time to grieve and then began searching for a rescue cat to give a good home to. We ended up adopting a young calico that has brought an abundance of joy into our home. She was on a journey of healing after almost dying from being given dog flea medication and we were on our journey of healing from a broken heart. We all needed love and somehow found each other. I will always open my heart and home to these animals in need for as long as I can handle it. I can't imagine my life without these loving furballs!
ReplyDeleteWhen my cat Jake died I didn't think I was going to get another cat since I still had Tiger who was 14 at the time. But it seemd that he missed his buddy and was heart broken because all he would do is go around the house meowing. So I got him a kitten...... he seems happier, but annoyed at times! Personally Im not sure if I can be happy at home without pets.
ReplyDelete