It can be hard to put my whole self out there. It can be hard to know who I am in some situations. When someone from the past asks about child #3, they will say things like, How is Prescott doing? How’s he liking England or Portland or his work etc. When that happens now, because everyone important or close has been told, I have to dig deep. Who am I in this situation? Do I just say, “SHE”, and go on with the conversation as if it is nothing big? It is big! Do I smile wide and say “oh, she’s in the process of transitioning”, without going into anything else. Do I let them ask questions? Do I know how to answer? This is her personal journey. I am a bystander, a caring one, but bystander just the same. Do I avoid the subject completely and just be careful with pronouns so that I am not disloyal. If I am avoiding, am I being disloyal? Maybe they haven’t earned the right to hear her story. There is a protective defensiveness that I have to be aware of too. My feelings are still comple...
I agree about envying builders. How satisfying (and empowering) it must be to feel you could build something like this. Very exciting.
ReplyDeleteYes, empowering is the right word.
DeleteNothing better than a relaxing bath after a long day of working in the garden! Soon, very soon.
ReplyDeleteYes ma'am. It's been a good long while. Cannot wait to get back to doing one of my very favorite activities.
DeleteIt's interesting how we have aversions to things. I love jade plants because my grandfather grew them. One of my aversions? Spoon collections. I have no idea why they anger me but they do. I see them when I am at work in clients homes and I glare at them.
ReplyDeleteI am looking forward to your new addition. How exciting!
A bath with bubbles is an absolute must.
Hahahaha....spoons. Isn't it funny how we all have these little things that often times we don't even know why?
Delete