Tuesday, April 25, 2017

TRUST, BUT VERIFY?

3:00am wake up call.  A nice warm breakfast made and served by the Boy Scout. One hour to LAX is unheard of; it's taken in excess of three hours on occasion. All is well.

But is it?  My anxiety rises as he gives me a sweet kiss and hug in the cool morning air. Off he goes with my Sophie sitting next to him. My counselor says that we all deserve someone we can trust but that implies that somewhere inside of me there is still a morsel of trust left. What do I trust these days?  Good question. I'll have to think that through. 

I know that I need to detach and TRUST in me and know that whatever happens at any given time, I
can trust that I will be there for myself and that should allow me some peace of mind. The fact of the matter is that men have let me down big time. There is the tape playing that says I'm not worthy of real love and consideration. I know it's not true logically but getting that message to my heart is work....hard work

I'm going to focus on the positive right now. I'm a smart gal, own a good business, have 4 kids that I adore, a family of support and a man who professes and shows me love and affection day and night.

Taking a deep breath and going to enjoy this trip. We'll let the chips fall where they may. I'm ok. Im ok. I'm ok. 

3 comments:

  1. You ARE ok. And the Boy Scout sounds like a keeper.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Love many.
    Trust few.
    Always paddle
    Your own canoe."

    Words to live by.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are definitely ok. And so is the Boy Scout!

    ReplyDelete

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