Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Respond; Don't React

Got invited to go to my daughters counseling appointment yesterday. She is working so hard and I am so proud of her. My girl is an amazing thoughtful person who is so purposeful and diligent in her endeavors at being an excellent girlfriend, daughter, sister and friend. It was lovely to go and to recognize how much she loves me despite all of my failures and faults. I am blessed beyond measure to be loved that way and to be able to, finally, know how to return it fully. 

One of the greatest gifts Al-Anon has given me is the ability to detach my personal value from just about everyone around me and allow me to love without conditions. My mothering skills, or lack of them, does not make me unlovable, it makes me human. Still my fear of many things get in the way of peace. But given some time, I am working those things out. Learning to recognize the difference between reactions and responses is my next goal. It's a sneaky moment I feel so assured that I am in the right and the next moment I find that I have something to work through and have to make an amend for words that have come out of my pie hole. My counselor has been talking to me about "time outs". Removing myself until I can be detached and reasonable. Haven't really got there yet but feel confident I will.

Meanwhile, Southern California is getting some RAIN. Think of it? Five, count them...5 years of drought has left this place dry as a bone. I forgotten the beautiful smell of moisture on dry ground and the feeling of days on end without the sun shining. Every drop that is falling is a sorely needed gift.

Wishing you a fabulous day♥

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