There is so much beauty in this world, it amazes me. We get to choose how we walk through life; we get to decide if our eyes are opened or if we shut them tight in a futile attempt to protect ourselves from the pain the world throws our way.
The "shutting of our eyes" may mean something different to me than it would to someone else. Pour moi, it means lashing out at what might hurt me, what scares me. If you are smart you won't get in the way. The other night I made a mistake of striking instead of conversing. I hate it when I do that...I HATE IT WHEN I DO THAT. My counselor talks about giving myself a time out to figure out why my reaction is so intense. Whether is stems from being abandoned by my alcoholic father or, perhaps, still dealing with the ugly demise of my marriage...I'm suppose to figure that out before engaging. I'm not that evolved yet but I am working on it. Later on, I was able to just talk, unemotionally and with logic, about the issue. I only wish I could have done it from the start.
On a lighter note, my work cash flow problem has been taken care of with some advice from a good friend. All is well for the time being. So grateful for the tools I have acquired through Al-Anon and counseling that allows me to keep things in a better perspective. Previously, I would have lost sleep and been jumping down my loved ones throats. Not this time....when the anxiety hit, I opened my tool chest. VICTORY!
Have a wonderful day my friend.