Thursday, October 22, 2015

Easy Does It

Whew! A great AA slogan. There was a time I would have laughed at someone suggesting that I NOT try to solve a problem at hand. Got to have everyone in line, performing up the the standards that make me feel safe and comfortable. If not, swift action was the plan of attack.  One of the kids doing something out of the ordinary?....get to the bottom of it. Husband not being an attentive father...my job to fix. The result is the people around me either got in line or they learned to hide.

Don't get me wrong, I am not actually a selfish person. I just never learned that, in life, there are times you will feel uncomfortable, and when those times come, knowing how to be Ok with the discomfort is important. This slogan reminds me to step back, not try to fix, and then deal with the discomfort I am feeling.

Pamela Madsen wrote in Psycology Today:


Helpful Tips For Getting Comfortable During Feelings of Being Uncomfortable:
1. Walk, or run outside. Movement in the fresh air can really help ease feelings of anxiety, stress and unease.
2. Write about it. I asked one of my friends if my writings sometimes worried her when I write in emotional states. She laughed. She said, "Pammy, I know that by the time I get to read your writing you have completely moved on and passed through those feelings". She is dead on right. When I write, blog or journal, it is a tool for me to move through my own uncomfortable feelings. Try it.
3. Help a friend. Get out of your own story and help someone with theirs! There is nothing like leaving your own uncomfortable feelings alone for a while to support someone else in theirs.
4. Self PleasureGet on the table, and get a massage. Give a massage. Make love. Moving physical energy is wonderful for helping pass the weather through your body. Get out of your head and into your body.
5. Give yourself some mantras: "Everything is going to be okay. If it's not Okay it's not Over" is a favorite of mine. Also reminding myself, that I am indeed the solid earth and the weather will pass.
6. Water in. Water on. Water out.  Water is a great mover of energy. Drink lots of it, pee, and take long showers or bathes.
7. Be in stillnessMeditate and connect to your breath.
8. Connect to your own spirituality and or religion. If you have a spiritual practice - practice it! Connecting to a higher power can be a beautiful way to find comfort in uncomfortable times.
My goal is to equate the discomfort I feel in my stomach with one of the above 8 suggestions rather than FIX. Wish me luck.

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