Big and Small Victories...Mostly BIG

Continuing my quest for happiness and peace, daily reminders are needed to support the changes made. Notes posted on my walls and in my car. Carefully following positive sites in social media. I even get a daily text reminding me to watch my thoughts and find the beauty in life. 

Life is good. Amen and amen.

When I backtrack, I no longer beat myself up....just do better next time. Inner thoughts slowly have improved.  No longer does that, "You're so "effing stupid" rule my peace. To that voice in my head, "You talk way too damn much and who asked your opinion anyways." Love and kindness, to others and to myself, will be the overriding goal. 

Saturday was our yearly Home Garden Tour. Plans fell through and I started the tour on my own, which was really OK. Only when I went up MY street, past MY house, did I have a rough time. Another persons' car was in the driveway. Furniture was being moved in. It put a damper on the afternoon but not out of control, just a melancholy that got better within a few hours. Victory!

Then, a text from my Secret Keeper. "I think of you everyday and I love you." he said. I could have been unkind and reminded him of all the terrible things he did to me and to our family, but I was not. "I know you do Dude", I answered back. And my heart filled with love and empathy for the broken man who lacks the tools to move forward. I also reminded myself that it is not now and never was my job to fix him.

Moving into my new, very old, house on Friday and Saturday. People I love will be there and I plan to celebrate just being there...in the moment....at the start of my new life. A life more full of happiness, peace and kindness and loads and loads of LOVE.

Comments

  1. devinneyhApril 30, 2015 at 2:59 PM

    Love and kindness is a good rule! It will get better and better. I'm excited for you! <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. LollyMay 1, 2015 at 3:53 PM

    Take the word stupid out of the Labels line. You are not now nor have you ever been stupid. Wishing you peace and love friend.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

What do you have to say about that?

Popular posts from this blog

A Journey To Home

Image
My tender hearted girl decided she wanted to foster an old lady. Selkie is 14, is nearly deaf and nearly blind, has a hard time walking and uses her bark to get her needs met.  She got her home, took her for a bath and then basically loved this old girl for three weeks until the property manager decided that it wasn’t a good match (barking too much AND because she is a pit bull).  My girl knew it was probably temporary but she gave that dog a comfortable loving home, away from the chaos of the shelter, for a short time.  Ideally, she would have walked her home but that’s not how it worked this time.  Last night she stood and ugly cried on a strangers shoulder after giving her back.  I love that girl and her sweet heart.  I wish Selkie a new final home full of love. 
Read more

Private Eye

Image
We pass by the house frequently since it sits on a busy thoroughfare. We know to look every time we pass and guess what will we see. Will it be the two Dalmatians, sitting on the couch that backs up to the giant panel window, waiting for their human to come home? Or will it be their human, sitting slightly to the right of middle (allowing for a better view of the giant mounted tv across the room) of the said couch. They are never there at the same time. It’s one or the other. One sleepless night, when my body was willing but my brain was not, I did a little sleuthing. It’s amazing what you can find out about a complete stranger.   His name is Gary and, from what I can tell, he’s never been married. He has worked his way up in a air duct company. He’s now the senior VP but it’s a small company and he still goes out on jobs, judging from  the reviews on Yelp. I know he has two siblings and that their father passed away in 2018. His memorial was held in a Buddhist temple and Gary...
Read more

Go!

Image
 Vai. E, se der medo, vai con medo mesmo. When one is raised in an angry family, it’s not enough to say I don’t want to be angry. You must learn how to do it differently. That’s no easy task. If judgment and self hatred became a way of life, a new way to live has to be taught. There are many ways to do it. Reading, writing, sharing, practicing all help the change. Counseling, psychoanalysis, religion, meditation, gratitude, have the ability to transform but I needed to see it in action, it needed to be more tangible, visual, accessible. I needed to understand the possibilities. There is a YouTube channel that I watch over and over again in order to absorb how to live more fully, more open and from the heart. One of the first episodes that I stumbled on is this…. The channel is Reflections of Life and through it we get to meet people who are doing life a little differently, often more soul based. People who are living life, healing wounds and finding what is truly important.  I...
Read more