Friday, October 3, 2014

Anxiety Won't Rule Me

Okay, so today I am feeling very anxious.

Phone calls and texts from a person with mental illness can make ones life feel completely out of control!

As I sit here and think about all I have learned in the past 11 weeks, I know that I have not learned enough to deal with this.  Boundaries, detaching with love, being manipulated, passive aggressive behaviors, thoughts of divorce, protecting ones assets.  How is one suppose to act when a loved one suggests that they have no reason to live unless they can have you?  What I need is a masters degree in every "effing" subject. It's all just too much.  

So.....I take a deep breath. Another and another.  Close my eyes and remind myself not to borrow trouble from tomorrow.  What will happen, will happen.  Back to my old mantra;

~My heart is full of love for my family. I will care for them and myself 
to the best of my ability.  God is in control and all is well~

All does not feel well but I will go with it for now and trust that this is what I need to do to get through my day without needing to medicate myself into oblivion (haha, see Sept 25th's "I Love Life" to know I am joking).  Today is my concern, not tomorrow.  I am trusting that God is in control here and has a plan for me and my loved ones.

 I am feeling a bit better....thanks for listening.

Be kind to yourself and your mentally ill loved ones (with healthy boundaries, of course)  ♥

1 comment:

  1. Yes, stay focused... <3... I so understand this on so many levels!


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