Yesterday and Today

30 years ago, this very moment, I was experiencing a whole bunch of firsts.

First time for:

  • being in the hospital (except for my own birth)
  • having surgery
  • being put under anesthesia
  • having my pubes shaved
  • meeting the biggest part of my heart in human form
I remember being so nervous. Feeling out of control. Having to trust practical strangers with so much. Wondering what kind of mom I would be, what kind of parents we would be.

If I knew then what I know now.....I would have cried. Cried for that man who was a good father, who tried so hard, but, in the end, could not hold it all together. I loved him and I remember clearly, despite the fact of being on loads of drugs for the planned C-section, how he held that girl and wept from pure joy. He held her close, just below his chin, as his tear flowed. But I digress....

This girl, who made me Mom, is precious and lovely. I've known her from her very first breath and, yet, there are times where I feel I hardly know her at all. Is it normal I still worry about her thirty years into it?

My heart is full today as I am reminded of the beauty afforded to me in this life. I am grateful.

Comments

  1. Marie SmithFebruary 1, 2018 at 8:37 AM

    It is normal to worry about our babies, no matter their age or ours! Happy birthday to you eldest sweetie! Have a great day, Linda.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Debra She Who SeeksFebruary 1, 2018 at 8:43 AM

    Happy Birthday to your daughter and Happy Birth Day to you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. JonoFebruary 1, 2018 at 10:37 AM

    I always wanted to send my mother a birthday card on my birthday. Alas, she was gone before I leaned how to write. I think a good mother always worries at least a little. Happy Day to you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. ToniFebruary 1, 2018 at 10:55 AM

    The most glorious and scary gift we ever receive! I wanted to be the 'best mom ever' and discovered that my daughter actually gets the award! Happy Anniversary of one of your best days ever.

    ReplyDelete
  5. MarthaFebruary 1, 2018 at 1:22 PM

    Sweet... Happy birthday to your daughter! Yes, it is perfectly normal that you still worry about her :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. BillFebruary 1, 2018 at 2:10 PM

    My wife and I always worry about our daughter and she will turn 36 later this month. We do our best and that's all you can do. I remember my mom telling me when she visited her mother (my grammy), she still treated her like she was a kid and mom was in her 70s. She worried about her mom and her mom worried back. :)
    Happy birthday to your daughter. Another year wiser, they say. :)
    Have a wonderful day/evening.

    ReplyDelete
  7. anne marie in phillyFebruary 1, 2018 at 3:44 PM

    your daughter sounds like a caring woman...just like her mama.

    ReplyDelete
  8. JeanieFebruary 2, 2018 at 5:12 AM

    My dad worried about me till the day he died and I think that even though I wasn't the one to give birth, I will always worry about Greg and Kevin. It's what we do. What beautiful memories you share here. Your daughter is lovely.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)February 2, 2018 at 8:58 AM

    Beautiful photo of you both!

    ReplyDelete
  10. ColetteFebruary 2, 2018 at 11:50 AM

    Yes, that is normal. It will never stop.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Silver in AZFebruary 2, 2018 at 12:39 PM

    congrats!!! and you aren't a good mama if you don't (always) worry.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Notes From ABroadFebruary 2, 2018 at 1:38 PM

    Mothers worry ,it’s what we do.
    :)
    I have 2, one of each.
    They now think I am the child.
    Or at least they think they know more than I.
    Shhh don’t tell them but they are probably right:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. My life so farFebruary 3, 2018 at 7:21 AM

    We always worry, until our dying days.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda dApril 1, 2018 at 9:30 AM

      I guess we do. But I'll take it one day at a time because it seems so big.

      Delete

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