Choose Different


Deep breathe. let the emotion flow unrestricted and then let it go.

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A Few More Than Sixteen Candles

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Our dear friend Nancy turned 100 a few weeks ago. Her daughter arranged for a lovely party at the local zoo that Nancy has generously supported through the years. She always has said she loves 4 legged creatures much more than 2. We flew down to Burbank Saturday morning and flew back home Monday. Quite a whirlwind trip.  Loads of longtime friends showed up to honor her and she was childlike in her delight at each face, many of them she had not seen in years. Part of the celebration included a performance by the students of The Teaching Zoo of Moorpark College . The entire party moved into a lecture hall, Nancy and her daughter sat front and center. The student handlers and their animals came in one by one. We learned about several different animals, their habitat, unique characteristics and how they are worked into the zoo program. I was not aware that porcupines are rodents. We were in a traditional lecture hall that rear seats loom high above the lecturer. The Boy Scout and ...
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You Have Not Heard The Half of It

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Surgery is done! The results are yet to be known. The doc whispered to me during my lovely twilight nap and I heard him so I am hopeful. Will know more the next few days and weeks. Interesting procedure, noisy and uncomfortable but I felt well at ease. He warned me that I would hear the loudest noise I have ever heard and he was not wrong. Very loud noises normally trigger my fight/flight response but apparently not when happy nap drugs are dripping in my veins. He graciously woke me to warn that it was coming, I replied with an ok and bam! “Wow”, was my only response. I think I sounded like a surfer dude. It was more of a “WOOOOOOOOOOOOW”, The tinnitus has not been reduced but it is also no louder. I gave it my best shot and what happens happens. The malleus, incus and stapes, which is smallest bone in the body. It’s gone and replaced with a prosthetic that looks like the tiniest plunger ever made. 
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Another Door

It can be hard to put my whole self out there. It can be hard to know who I am in some situations.  When someone from the past asks about child #3, they will say things like, How is Prescott doing? How’s he liking England or Portland or his work etc. When that happens now, because everyone important or close has been told, I have to dig deep. Who am I in this situation? Do I just say, “SHE”, and go on with the conversation as if it is nothing big? It is big! Do I smile wide and say “oh, she’s in the process of transitioning”, without going into anything else. Do I let them ask questions? Do I know how to answer? This is her personal journey. I am a bystander, a caring one, but bystander just the same. Do I avoid the subject completely and just be careful with pronouns so that I am not disloyal. If I am avoiding, am I being disloyal? Maybe they haven’t earned the right to hear her story. There is a protective defensiveness that I have to be aware of too. My feelings are still comple...
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